I have had many “real talk” questions and I am starting with this one. I mean, why start with the easy questions? Let’s just dig in now..
So.. we move my youngest son, into _____ on Thursday. He will be 19 in October.
As far as I know, he hasn’t been sexually active yet, and we have talked openly about sex and bodies throughout the years and prayerfully tried to instill Godly values regarding purity, respect, etc.,
That being said.. I was a 19yr old mom.. 4 months pregnant when I married, and my husband and I had both had previous sexual relationships. My husband wasn’t a Christian (though was saved a few years later, praise the Lord!), but I was, so I know that things happen despite what we know to be right.
I’m a bit of an OCD planner, so I’ve been keeping spreadsheets and planning for college/dorm stuff for months. Even though I’m pretty sure I’ve read every “must have dorm essentials” article written in the last 10 years, I just ran across one last night that has been rattling around in my brain now… it emphasized how important it was to send condoms.. That has never crossed my mind once before now, but now that it has, I’m really in a quandary. I know that colleges have tons of places where students can get condoms.. but I also know they are generally very cheap ones. I’m really confused, because I don’t in any way want to condone or encourage sexual behavior, but I definitely want him to be safe and protected if his flesh overrules his heart/mind. We will definitely sit down and have a very honest, open discussion this week either way, but I’m just curious what counsel you may have or have received on this in the past? On one hand, I feel like if he was too embarrassed to go get them, maybe that would keep him from doing anything. But, remembering my own flesh, I feel like there’s more chance that he would continue without it, than to not do it at all – especially knowing his temperament/personality. But, I would hate to think that he was more likely to do something because he already felt “prepared” somehow. On the other hand, I don’t know that he would really be too embarrassed anyway, but who knows. Argh.. Parenting adults is TOUGH!