Itching in Panic

Over the past few weeks, Brad has been keeping me updated on the long process of publishing a book. I have basically let him handle all of the business part of it. He is much better with that type of stuff. I either like something or I don’t. It is that easy. I deal in black and white. He works in gorgeous colors and paints together brilliance.

Today, he said, come look. I peeked over his computer to see lots of tracking numbers. Yes, those tracking numbers mean boxes of books. My heart dropped for a brief, ok, 5 or 10 minutes, while the reality of boxes of books showing up on my door, caused me to tremble a bit.  I have no idea what I will do with boxes of books. We are new at this. I am very simplistic. God told me to write a book and I did. We felt like God was saying to publish it ourselves and we did.

So a large box of books means a large chunk of change we borrowed to print the books. And by this time, I am itching all over in total panic. What have I done? All the questions, doubts, and insecurities rush over me like a huge ocean wave ready to crush whoever is in its path. I am that person, standing in the middle of the ocean wondering if we are going to sink or swim. Wondering how I ever got into this position? Me, write a book about me. Except it is not about me, it is about God. It is about a woman who was standing in an ocean and the waves were coming and you will have to read the book to discover whether or not she will be swept away. 🙂

Needless to say, I am scared, excited, and humbled. It is like a kindergartener painting a picture and all she does is mix all the colors on a page. I am that page. A mix of feelings and colors.

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8 thoughts on “Itching in Panic

  1. I’ve been praying for you 🙂 I think I’ve pre-sold at least a box! Lol. I hear someone talking about a problem, any struggle at all and I tell them, “you need to read Kasey’s book!” I believe that. With all. My. Heart. It’s good And hard things and I’m so, so, so excited to see God use it!!!

  2. You have been obedient to what God has led you to do. Be obedient with what He leads you to do with the book. He’s at work in you and through you. People need to hear what your heart says in the book!!!!
    I’m trembling with excitement over the pending arrival of the book!!!!! Doing the dance of joy!!!!

  3. Kasey I have been “itching” to read this book! I will be honestly, I am a little scared to read it. But I cannot wait! How do we get our hands on one?

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